Sunday, September 29, 2019

NYC HUMAN RIGHTS COMMISSION BANS US OF THE TERM, "ILLEGAL ALIEN"!


Well, that does it! It’s Sunday morning and I’m off to the exercise emporium. I hope I don’t get stopped by the police for doing an unauthorized left turn. If the officer searches my car he will find an illegitimate metal tube containing small missiles propelled by an explosive force which I carry to protect me from undocumented persons who have come here as uninvited guests doubtless on their way to the Waldorf Astoria for afternoon tea.

When I return to my accommodation unit I’m going to smoke some unrecommended combustible material which I bought from the local unlicensed pharmacist. Afterwards I’m thinking about visiting the local Bank of America branch to relieve it of its cash and hope the employees won’t be too disturbed when I show them my unauthorized mechanical device as a means of encouragement. After all, I don’t want to do anything illegal!

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